Jobless Rate Rises by One.

Image by Cornell University Library via Flickr

On Friday, I opened my email at work and read this:

Your position with —  is being terminated due to restructuring. Let’s meet at 4:45 to discuss further.

The person who sent the email sat behind me, only two-feet away.

Instead of turning around and facing the person who sent the email and saying “WTF?” I clicked on “compose mail” and responded with this.

I’d rather meet this morning.

 She fired off this 22-caliber email, which grazed my arm.

Let’s meet at 11:00 a.m.

And so I spent the last two hours of my jobful morning clearing my desk and bidding co-workers adieu. “Adieu to you and you,” I said, who were my two friends.

Now that I am free to explore the endless employment possibilities, I can’t wait to roll up the sleeves on my sweat top and jump back into the job market waters, which has reached the freezing point. I hope I don’t suffer a concussion and bruise my id, or ergo the ego will get mighty pissed.

Craig, honey, I’m back and ready to scroll through your lists.

Cheek to cheek kiss.

Now chew on this earlier post after ingesting my words:

Caught in the Unemployment Voice Mail Undertow

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15 Comments Jobless Rate Rises by One.

  1. ReformingGeek

    Dang. I'm sorry to hear that.

    An email axing? That's so pathetic.

    The company I used to work for did that when they did their first round of a massive layoff. The email sent you to a staging area where you were given your severance package and then escorted out of the building.

    One lady had to be personally gathered up because they disabled her email account before she received the email. She was shocked because she thought she had survived the massacre.

  2. Jack

    Several times I survived massacres and had to watch as former co-workers tearfully loaded cardboard boxes and carried them past my cubicle. What do you say? "Good luck" seems cruel. Holden was right about that. Then my turn came, and there was no one left to wonder what to say: We all got it at once on a spring day in 2004, when the catalog company where I worked as an ad copywriter was bought out by a bottom-feeding company looking for bargains. But at least they had the decency of appearing concerned, and they offered a nice severance and a bonus to people who stayed for a transition period. But at 57, I was at my theoretical peak earning years and had already crested the hill. I eventually found a new niche, but it took a good three years. Bon chance!

  3. Lauren

    Reffie: I was shocked when I opened the email then was pissed several minutes later after reality sunk in.

    This is horrible. "The email sent you to a staging area where you were given your severance package and then escorted out of the building." Sounds so 1984. Honestly, nothing surprises me anymore.

  4. Lauren

    Jack: Really enjoyed meeting you today at Adele's. Hope this is the same Jack.

    It's almost worse to watch the death march of others pass you by. At least when it's your turn to carry the cardboard box, your numb with shock. Glad you were able to finally find your niche.

  5. Jack

    Yes, Lauren, it's the same Jack. Really good to meet you too. I enjoyed talking to you. I hope you find a new niche soon!

  6. Sandee

    I'm so sorry. What a cruel way to fire someone/let someone go. Everything seems so impersonal anymore.

    Big hug coming from California. 🙂

  7. Greg

    I'm so sorry!

    What a fucking gutless way to let someone go! Good Luck on your job search, you should post her email and encourage your readers to let her have it…

  8. Lauren

    Jack: Thank you.

    Sandee: Appreciate the virtual hugs.

    Thanks Ziva. They are a coward!

    Greg: I really appreciate that.

  9. James MacAdam

    I'm very sorry to hear that you were restructured out of a job, Lauren, that really blows! The least they could have done was inform you in person instead of literally behind your back. I mean, didn't they know that was in elbow range? I applaud your self-control.

  10. THE SNEE

    Hi Lauren,

    I'm so sorry! Thank goodness for your wit, and your humor. Even when you are hurting, you have a way with words that manages to hit all emotional ranges with a swoop. I'm thinking of you.


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