Sarah Palin Magazine – Coming soon to a newsstand near you. (They still have those?) The only magazine with run on sentences and fictionalized accounts of the facts.
“The genesis of it was really simple,” said Steve LeGrice, the publisher and editor of Imagine That. “We’re up here in New York, and there was clearly this huge enthusiasm for Sarah Palin . . .
He must be confusing New York with Russia. She can see it from her house, you know.
” . . . and at the same time all the people in the media world were sitting around scratching their heads” about how people could support her.”
Scratching their heads because of the lice they contracted from the free hats she may have been handing out. The hats, that once belonged to a minion of moose she shot with an AK-47 from a helicopter, were immediately recycled and placed into the promotional drawer upon extermination of the hosts. She used Dick Cheney on the ground as back up, instructing him to aim his rifle in the opposite direction, thus ensuring a direct hit.
“What we decided to do is put out a magazine all in her own words,” he said — a magazine “without any opinion or anything added in.”
Wink. Wink. Nod. Nod.
The Palin issue contains what LeGrice said are family pictures of Palin not previously published by a magazine — including her as a child with her siblings and a dead bear bleeding over a stump; picking through shot white birds; holding a cardboard box of fish freshly caught at an ice hole; and with moose antlers still attached to a fragment of bloody skull.
Charming. Sounds like one of my family pictures minus the dead bear bleeding over a stump and other sordid animal carnage.
“I want people to know what I stand for and judge me on that … read in my own words who I am. Don’t believe the things that are made up,” the magazine quotes Palin as saying.
It was horrible how CBS doctored the footage of the Katie Couric/Sarah Palin interview to make Sarah look like an idiot. That’s right! They didn’t have to touch a thing, thus saving CBS the need to incur the extra expense. Palin really was an idiot and couldn’t name one newspaper she read. I guess she had better luck with magazines, which is a great reason to launch one.
So, walk don’t run to your nearest newsstand (I swear the last one I saw was on the corner of 42nd and Park) or convenience store to get your copy of Sarah Palin Magazine, retailing at $8.99, around the same price she paid for building her Wasilla house.
Will you buy a copy of Sarah Palin magazine to
A. read?B. cover the bottom of your bird cage?C. display in magazine racks at abortion doctors’ offices?D. bonk right wing extremists over the head every time they say something offensive?