Happy New Year to Humans, Cats, and Writer’s blocks!


Created in Microsoft Word
Created in Microsoft Word. 

Writing Avoidance 101


Chapter 1
Clean out the closet: 
 –  Color coordinate clothing and group by season, color, and gradation of wear.
 – Arrange shoes by comfort level and tripping scale: 3-inch heels, 2-inch heels, flat soles, rubber soles, no soul.

Chapter 2
Add extra meals to your day.
 – Dawnfast (before breakfast)
 – Pre-lunch quality control (brunch makeover)
 – Midday food dalliance
 – Late afternoon gorge fest
 – Dinpost Snack (after dinner snack before dessert)
 – Midnight Heartburn Raid

Chapter 3
Go Shopping.
– Buy something, anything to get yourself away from the keyboard. 
Caution: Do not bring a laptop. It will distract you from shopping.

Chapter 4
Take a nap.
 – After breakfast
 – After lunch
 – Before dinner
 – After Dinpost
 – Go to bed.

Chapter 5
Take a head trip.Tahiti is nice this time of year.
 – Please refer to: Why head trips are Cost-Effective? 
Note: Dual headphones with USB port available for head trip shares.

Chapter 6 
Pretend it’s New Year’s Eve (Wait a minute. It is New Year’s Eve!)
– Drink Whiskey or another imbibing liquid and invite over friends.
Caution: Driving and/or writing while intoxicated is prohibited, especially simultaneously. It’s just plain stupid. You’ll get your writing credentials revoked.

Chapter 7
Pretend you’re a best-selling author and throw yourself a book party.
  – Just pull any book off the shelf and cover the author’s picture with a nice photo of yourself. 

Chapter 8
Pretend that you were kidnapped by elves and go to the movies.
 – Leave a tiny ransom note by the dog’s water dish along with a tiny green felt hat.

Chapter 9
Do research on the Internet.
 – You’ll get sucked into the black hole of cyberspace and never set foot on mother earth again.

Chapter 10
Type the same sentence over and over again until you drop.
 – I suck as a writer and have no business in writing anything but emails to friends or letters to editors about neighbors tossing garbage on my lawn for the deer to eat.

Happy New Year! 
Do you have any advice about anything?


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18 Comments Happy New Year to Humans, Cats, and Writer’s blocks!

  1. JD at I Do Things


    Right after my Dinpost Snack, I think I'll throw myself a book party. My two cats will be attending. We'll eat cupcakes and watch YouTube videos.

    I predict it will be an early night.

    Happy New Year!

  2. Lauren

    Ha! I'm about ready for my pre-dinner nap and later afternoon gorge fest. Enjoy your early night with your cats. Thanks for commenting. Happy New Year!

  3. Carl

    Haha, before my nap..Happy New Year!:) Ten years ago tonight I was on a ship in the Golf of Mexico celebrating the year 2000. Nobody knew if everything would stop or not, as the clock clicked toward midnight.We even wondered if somehow the computer on the ship would be effected.:) It is hard to believe that a decade has pasted since that night..I think my New Year resoulation may be"to procrastinate less".
    I hope that 2010 will be a bright, shinning year for you Lauren.I have enjoyed reading you these last few weeks and enjoy seeing your comments on carlsvilleproject.I hope we are able to stay in touch for a long time>:)
    See you next year.

  4. Lauren

    Carl: Ten years has passed too quickly. It's hard to imagine that people thought the world would end back then because of the computers changing to the year 2000.

    Thank you so much for what you do at your blog. You provide such an important and great service.

    I will definitely stay in touch and be a regular at the carlsvilleproject. Thank you for being a regular here.

    Best wishes for a wonderful 2010 to you and your family.

  5. Will

    Hi Lauren.
    Thank you for your nice comment!
    Loved your story and the art pic you made!
    A Happy New Year to you and your family!

  6. Daisy

    My favorite is Chapter 8. Only I wish real elves actually would kidnap me. We would have a blast!

    Happy New Year to you!

  7. Lauren

    Will: Thanks, Will. Same to you and yours. Have a wonderful New Year's. Glad you loved my, ahem, artwork and story.

    Daisy: Thanks so much for commenting. I'm still looking for the note and tiny felt cap by the dog's water dish. Enjoy your day! Happy New Year!

  8. ManOverBoard.com


    I hope you have the BEST 2010 and that each day becomes more of a blessing for you and your family. Thank you for being my friend and the advice you have given to me and my readers. You are a gem.. Glenn

    Thanks for stopping by and visiting it means a lot !!!!

  9. Lauren

    Thank you, Glenn. Wow! I don't know what to say. I'm so overwhelmed by your kind words. I really appreciate your friendship, too, and wish you and your family all the best in 2010 and beyond. I will definitely stay in touch. Thank you so much for stopping by. It made my night!

  10. mommapolitico

    #4 is my favorite, but I love the idea of having a book party! Gotta add that to the list. Checking out blogs of my friends in the blogosphere always gives me time to delay…

    Happy 2010 to you and yours, Lauren. May we find health wealth and happiness, or a generous combination therein. Glad our paths have crossed out here on the intertubes!

  11. Lauren

    Hi Perry,

    Hope you and your family had a wonderful New Year's. Much happiness, love, and prosperity to you and your family in 2010 and beyond. Thanks for always coming around and for being such a great friend.

  12. kys

    Happy New Year! I hope 2010 is fantastic for you and your family!

    PS I've found that alphabetizing our dvd's, cd's, and books is a great divergence.

  13. Lauren

    Thanks,Kys. I wish the best for you and your family and will definitely look into alphabetizing. : ) Thanks for always coming around here and commenting. I feel so blessed to have met such wonderful people in cyberspace. Thanks for being such a great friend. I repeat myself with earnestness.

  14. Andrea (ace1028)

    Excellent. Absolutely excellent. I should definitely do that with a book. I've been planning to write one since I was a kid! Happy 2010!

  15. Ryhen Satch

    I'm so late. Argghhh. Well, anyway, Happy New Year Lauren. I really like your plans. I'm thinking about borrowing some to have them in my own list. Hmm… let me see… maybe Chapter 4 would fit nicely. haha.

    Hope you have a great time this 2010! I'll always be here to enjoy your mind-boggling thoughts. lol.


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