Received an email this morning, which I am categorizing as “spam scam scum.” Emails from evil doers, who have somehow escaped the access of evil, sneaked into Rwanda, or in this case Poland, and send emails to the most vulnerable — the broke or unemployed.
They will try anything to help themselves to your bank account.
To the desperate or any one who receives suspect emails, beware the spammer. Rid your in-box of spam vermin by putting them in their place, in the spam folder. Too bad there isn’t a “burn in hell” folder.
From: jenalyn Baez
show details 6:07 AM (3 hours ago)
Please,review the message below.
European escrow service company seeks for the courier clerk employee. It is a remote/part-time/full-time position and it is home-based.
SOUNDS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE!!!
Service of Easy Packages inc was founded by several Polish businessmen and is on the international market over 5 years with its Warsaw head office.
I SWEAR. I DIDN’T MAKE THIS UP!
SEP inc performs the middleman dispatch duties for our clients worldwide. You are required to have a PC with web access along with printer or scanner.
THAT’ S SCANNER, NOT SCAMMER.
Right now we are hiring employees for courier clerk position in the US. The duties you will be performing will include tracking and receiving packages, sending it with the materials we provide. The pay is $60 for each received and sent package (it is calculated in a total monthly pay and paid at the end of each working month, $1500 is a minimum guaranteed monthly amount and it does not depend on the amount of packages that you have handled)
I’LL TAKE WHAT’S INSIDE PACKAGE #1 — STOLEN STEREO EQUIPMENT.
18 minimum age,-
-be located at designated address on a regular basis,
-be available to work on PC with Internet access,
– have day time contact phone number.
THANK GOD. I QUALIFY.
Your duties may include visiting USPS/UPS/FedEx branches.
DOODY OR CACA IS MORE APROPOS.
The working hours and working volume is:
-8 hours per week-
4-10 packages handled weekly in average.
SOUNDS DOABLE. THOUGH, I’LL HAVE TO CHECK MY ABUNDANTLY FREE SCHEDULE TO SEE IF I HAVE TIME.
Mostly all packages are not big and will not require any special storage place.
LIKE A PRISON CELL.
To avoid any illegal issues or activities all the packages are being shipped/re-shipped by the big services like FedEx, UPS and DHL who have the strongest security systems nowadays. You can also inspect the contents of packages before re-shipping it to our customer.
IF YOU CAN OPEN THE BOX. THEY ARE WELDED SHUT.
We would be glad and ready to get started with the application process with you if you match our requirements.
NAIVE AND DESPERATE.
Bettyann Kimberley to smelly132.
Order Vicodin, Codeine, Hydrocodone, Paracod, Phentermin
at CheapestPrice on net.
100% FDA APPR0VED.
Stop incessant and annoying spam with the click of a mouse!
Disclaimer: Some comments have been edited for comedic value or grammatical inconsistencies. OMG! I’ve completely lost it. I’m editing Spam for Christ’s Sake.
A scammer’s email that dropped into my spam folder like bird excrement
Subject: kindly consider my proposal. (Reply: kindly go f**k yourself)
Let me start by apologizing the manner at which i approached you without prior communication.
(your present communication ain’t so great either).
I will need you to assist me in executing a business project worth five million five hundred US dollars, that involves transfering the said fund from my country to your country.
(As someone with no financial background or mathematical aptitude I am totally qualified to assist you in said fund transference. Are you familiar with Freud? Perhaps this is a transference of your stupidity)
Once the funds have been transferred to your nominated bank account, we shall then share it in the ratio of 60% for me, 40% for you.
(Do you want to build a house on swamp land? This is just like that only more insane, i.e., see previous section on Freud)
Should you be interested in this project, please kindly reply me in my private email: email@example.com, so that i can give you the full detail of the project.
Your earlier reply will be highly appreciated, thanks for your consideration.
(thanks for the attempted con)
(go to hell! or back to spam land)
Patrick Chan firstname.lastname@example.org
Beware of Literary
Internet Debris . . .
Caught in the Cyberspace Spam Continuum
I admire the creativity involved in the latest alien spam that landed in my inbox. Both contained riddles that I found intriguing and actually considered clicking the hyperlinks until Caution and Restraint grabbed me by the shoulders and shook some sense into me.
Subject: Black sheep of the family
It was made up of no fewer than thirteen vessels, and was manned by some 1,200 men.
Hello, i am Ramona Applegate
Try it http://r-brent.narod.ru
Ah, what have you done to me, and why.
So he reasoned.
Subject: Neither fish nor flesh, nor good red herrin
It was cabots intention to establish himself permanently on the shores of this great river system.
Hello, i am Katherine Titmuss
Try it http://caelieburgh.narod.ru
Sergey kuzmich, from all sides reports reach me, etc.
This stout young man was an illegitimate son of count, a well known grandee of catherines time who now lay dying in moscow.
Any one want to take a stab at the riddles?
(We’re not even on speaking terms.)
My name is Julet Desmond the only daughter of late Mr.and Mrs.Desmond.
(Could have been the bad shrimp.)
(It’s amazing he had the energy to utter the entire amount of U.S. dollars in addition to providing details of the transaction before croaking.)
I am living in senegal now.
(Don’t call me dear.)
(Sure. No problem.)
To serve as a guardian of this fund since I am only 22years and To make arrangement for me to come over to your country to further my education (in a career in crime) and to secure a resident permit in your country while you will be take care of investing this money.
(Of course. wink. wink)
(I told you. Don’t call me dear.)
I am willing to offer you 15% of the total sum as compensation for your effort/ input after the successful transfer of this fund into your nominated account overseas
(Wow 15%. What a deal!)
Furthermore, you indicate your options towards assisting me as I believe that this transaction would be concluded within a sort posille
(WTF?) time.if you are interested .
pls email me with my email address
(You should know your e-mail address.)
so that i can give you more details and and my pic for you to know me i will stop here for now waiting hear from you soon.
(Are you familiar with a chap called Godot?)
Thanks and God bless.
(I didn’t sneeze.)